East Coast Wedding

We were off again to the East Coast for the wedding of Ram’s grand nephew. Ram’s sisters Siti and Rashidah followed us. We stopped overnight in Sita’s house in Kerteh and the next day went straight to Kota Bahru. Sita and Najla followed us too.

I read in my friend’s blog in of a trip he made by taxi from Kuantan to Kerteh. Along the way there were two road blocks. At one of the road blocks there was a hint for palm-greasing, to overlook an offence, but the taxi driver got away and escape having to “grease” the official!! I traveled the same route on that same day and went through the same road blocks. At the second block, this one official walked around my car. I noticed he was looking at my road tax disc (ok there, as my road tax was still current), then he looked at my tyres (ok there too, as my tyres were fairly new) then he grinned (that haa I found something grin!!) and pointed at something in the front of the car happy that he has found something that he can pick on???? I wound down my window and asked him what it was and he said that my number plate does not conform to regulations. It is shiny he said. I just looked at him, gave a wry smile, wound up my window and drove off. I saw in the rearview mirror that he was looking in my direction for quite a while as I drove off but did not see him doing anything else. Ok there I suppose.

We stayed at Riverside Hotel together with all other family members attending the wedding. The bridegroom, his parents and his grandfather were already there when we arrived while the others arrived later in the evening. We were all allocated neighbouring rooms on the same floor, and boy was it noisy when they had arrived and checked in. Very very noisy indeed. It was as though we had not met for a long time. It was like everyone was talking at the same time and it got louder to get over the din!!

The next day all were ready by about 10.30am to proceed to the mosque close to the bride’s home. The marriage ceremony was scheduled to be held in the mosque at 11.00am. We were in a convoy of ten cars. Another group was already waiting at the mosque for us with nine trays of gifts including a ring, dowry and other stuff. The bride’s family brought eleven trays of gifts in return. (It is customary in Malay weddings that the bride’s side reciprocates with gifts two more over the number the bridegroom’s side brings).

The solemnization ceremony went without a hitch. It starts with the grandfather, as spokesman for the bridegroom’s side giving the standard address to those present on the intentions of the gathering, the dowry, the gifts, and thanking all including the Imam for making time etc. The Imam then gave a short sermon on the marriage, quoting verses from the Holy Book and the Hadith, etc. Then came the solemnization itself or the marriage vows. Holding the bridegroom’s hand, the Imam stated in a sentence that he offers the bride (name is stated), as represented to him by the bride’s father, in marriage with a dowry of ….. (the amount agreed). The bridegroom has to immediately reply that he accepts the bride (stating her name) in marriage with the dowry (stating the amount mentioned by the Imam). Two witnesses, nominated by the bride’s side attest that this solemnization takes place. Their names and signatures usually appears in the marriage certificate, together with the names of the Imam or whoever performs the solemnization ceremony (it is most appropriate for the bride’s father to perform this but sometimes the father appoints the Imam to represent him. In my case I performed this task when Sita married Fahrul). The bridegroom than reads out the customary vows that he will take care of the bride and provide for her and so on so on. That ends the solemnization ceremony and usually the wedding celebration begins.

Wedding celebrations in recent years had been shortened and simplified a lot. I remember, in my younger days, when my elders got married, the celebration would stretch over a few days. Now it would only take up one afternoon or maybe stretch only to the evening and night. Everyone seems to be in a hurry to get things done with, nowadays. Perhaps it is too costly to have it like the olden days. Those days, the whole neighbourhood would come and assists in the preparations and getting the celebrations going, but now, it is all catered out, pharmed out to marriage planners, caterers, and wedding organizers. These cost money.

After the solemnization ceremony in the mosque, all of us were invited by the bride’s family to the house for lunch followed by photo taking session. Lunch was the traditional wedding lunch of briani rice and the accompanied condiments. Ram and I were extra careful in what we ate and drank, the experience of our previous trip to this part of the country still fresh in our minds, although news had been made that the state had overcome the health problems they had. We were all done by 2.00pm. Our entourage took leave and headed back to the hotel, while Ram and I together with Sita, Rashidah and Siti headed for Kerteh.

All the time that we were with the family members, Najla and two other second cousins of hers of about her age (less than 1 year olds) seemed to be celebrities of some sort with all present including other guests at the wedding. Najla were passed on from one hand to another and she appeared to be enjoying the attention given. Babies somehow attracts the most attention always….

MKI Ramblings Unlimited
Petaling Jaya